An exciting new movie script: Mike messes up

Synopsis:

Handsome 50-something Mike has it all.  He is national secretary of a trade union, president of the Democrat Party, has a glamorous wife and five children, as well as a stunning mistress.  He holds a number of appointments which have been given to him by a sympathetic state government but he is going backwards financially.

A large house in LA, a beach house, private school fees – these things don’t come cheap. He sets up a fictitious company in his wife’s name to channel much needed funds to the family. He extracts an American Express card from the owners of the printers who undertake the union’s work.  He enters into another deal which involves kick-backs from one of the union suppliers, the proceeds of which are delivered to him via his mistress – in brown paper bags, no less.

Just when he thinks life can’t get any better, everything begins to unravel.  Former side-kick and protegee, Craig, who has entered politics, is found to have used his credit card to pay for prostitutes. Investigative reporter, Kate, starts digging around.  The police become interested.

The climax of the film takes place in a carpark where Mike has instructed his son, Chris, to take the suitcase filled with damaging documents and escape.  He tells Chris that the police will not recognise him, but  it turns out that the police have been listening to Mike’s phone calls.

The final scene shows Mike, wearing an orange onesie, being booked in for a long stint in jail.

Suggested casting:

Mike: Harrison Ford

Wife:  Susan Sarandon

Mistress: Julia Roberts

Craig: Leonardo di Caprio

Chris: Bradley Cooper

Kate: Meryl Streep

Summation:

The script may look a little far-fetched but, with that cast, the movie will be a box-office hit (although it will never be shown on the Australian Broadcasting Corporation).

Suggested titles:

Mike messes up

Just one bad apple: the Mike Williamson story

From here to hell: the inside story of a union official

 

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28 Responses to An exciting new movie script: Mike messes up

  1. stackja

    Kate: Meryl Streep [Kathy Jackson]

  2. H B Bear

    Soundtrack by Benny Hill.

    Surely there must be a cameo by Dooogie Cameron to deliver the line, “Watch ma teah” too.

  3. Actors Equity or whatever they are called now (Media & Arts Alliance?) – seldom allow realistic portrayals of Australian trade unions. It has been a gap in all our local produced TV & film “drama” for so long now – part of our landscape.

  4. Bruce

    I’m sad to see that Jeremy Irons of the pink castle does not get a major part. But perhaps the writer can add a character, lets call him Joe Junior, which could only add to the sweep of the epic.

    Oops, sorry, the HSU? I was thinking of a different union scandal. Silly me.

  5. jupes

    What? No part for Mike’s daughter working in the President’s office?

  6. Chistery

    Your Hollywood line up is way too ambitious, but you might get a little something if you drop this into the suggestion box of the Underbelly producers.

    I would like to see Craig’s wimpering address to parliament proclaiming his innocence.

  7. james

    Suggested titles:

    Krazy Korrupt Kapers?

  8. Judith Sloan

    Yeh, another Underbelly franchise … now you’re talking.

  9. boy on a bike

    Title: “Working Class Man”.

  10. ar

    At some stage he has to yell, “You can’t handle the truth!”

  11. ar

    Sub-plot suggestion – the rock star son pens a hit record in the studio paid for by union dues.

    Quick, someone buy the rights for Sadie the Cleaning Lady…

  12. Leigh Lowe

    Mike: Harrison Ford Phil Spector
    Wife: Susan Sarandon Kathy Bates (“Misery”)
    Mistress: Julia Roberts Pammy Anderson
    Craig: LeonardoDanny di Vito Caprio
    Chris: Bradley Cooper (the guy who played Mini-Me in the austin Powers movies)
    Kate: Meryl Streep …. “a drongo’s got me money!!!”

  13. Empire Strikes Back

    Go the Underbelly route Judith.

    Your plot is too similar to the Netflix US version of House of Cards.

  14. Lucie

    Gee those big names cast the real characters in a verry flattering light. Talk about instant Hollywood Makeover. Surprised Our Cate didn’t get a guernsey, though, as ‘Kate’. (Perhaps she was tied up on another project, such as the Green Schemes production of The Greatest Scam on Earth.)

    “It Wasn’t Me” by Shaggy, for the theme song? And for the closing credits, “We R Us”, the scorching debut release from quirky new ‘book-reading-to-music-by-candlelight’ lounge act, Joolya?

    No doubt a sequel’s already in the works, too – “How Far We Scum Have Come”, in which Mike emerges from prison, Mandela-like, and is made first President of the People’s Republic of Ostrayleeyah – perfect excuse for another new flag competition; entry by Cornflakes token. Theme song: “We Did U
    Our Way”.

  15. John

    What role did Tony Abbott play in all these?

    You’d better get a handsome actor to play him.

  16. Bruce

    Youse can all mock but Mike’s laughing.He’ll get to keep all his ill gotten millions and probably do no more than a couple of years jail time in a minimum security holiday camp.

  17. Steve D

    Kate: Meryl Streep …. “a drongo’s got me money!!!”

    Well played.

  18. JimmyS

    Surely Hugh Grant would play the role of Craig?! Or Charlie Sheen.

  19. MikeS

    Perhaps Screen Australia could underwrite it. A tentative working title could be “Don’t You Know Who I Am?”

  20. Alain

    Who is Williamson’s mistress and is she hot?

  21. Rob

    Who is Williamson’s mistress and is she hot?

    I don’t know but he kind of fits the profile of TLS. Married, corrupt head of a union. In which case the answer to the second part would be – Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

  22. Verandah

    The only problem with gaoling him is that the Prison union
    will no doubt give him a free ride.
    Such a shame.
    I’m sure the big crims would like to do to him what he did to the union members.

  23. Token

    TiTle suggestion:

    The crook & thief, his wife & Shagger

  24. take the suitcase filled with damaging documents and escape.

    Once upon a time those documents might – with the help of some lawnmower fuel – have fed the backyard incinerator (discreetly, along with the lawn clippings and autumn leaves), but the Green/Left luvvies stepped on that one. Nice job shooting your own foot, you arseholes!

  25. MT Isa Miner

    perturbed

    #1038434, posted on October 17, 2013 at 12:15 am

    take the suitcase filled with damaging documents and escape.

    Once upon a time those documents might – with the help of some lawnmower fuel – have fed the backyard incinerator (discreetly, along with the lawn clippings and autumn leaves), but the Green/Left luvvies stepped on that one. Nice job shooting your own foot, you arseholes!

    Peturbed, I’ll never understand how come they didn’t cover their tracks. Just like I still don’t get it why after a woman lawyer is basically sacked by the partners she figures she can go on to have a career that is so public as a politician let alone PM? Don’t they figure some day some time it’s going to be judgement day?

    Even if they think that we , the general pubic ARE stupid- they must in some corner of the rat brain know that the person that flys the plane they are travelling in is not stupid and the bloke that made the computer is not stupid etc. OR do they constantly crunch the numbers and figure on never meeting any smart enough ones? That question is not rhetorical, I’d like to know what people figure.

    But onto backyard fires

    My dad, God rest his soul, LOVED, his weekend bonfires, bigger the better, competing with, Mr Kelly 2 houses down, Mr Muller across the road, Mr Carter 1 house down but not Mr Honeywell on the other side because he didn’t work in the Mines and he was in Rotary.

    My Dad in his stubbies and with a stubbie and Bonds singlet and a constantly lit Craven A circling the 44 drum, he would chuck in everything: get me some more rubbish he would command because all the paper was used up first of course.

    And all of us kids would race and bring him Styrofoam trays, remember how they wrinkled as they burned, and gladwrap from school lunches and plastic six pack stubby rings and run round screaming and sucking up the carcinogens. Those were the days.

  26. Andrew of Randwick

    Mt Isa Miner:

    And all of us kids would race and bring him Styrofoam trays, remember how they wrinkled as they burned

    Ah yes, those were the days when an older brother [accidently] dripped the molten plastic on his sister’s foot leaving her with a tattoo like scattered pearls.

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