Beer Politics

This is Bill Shorten attempting to skol a beer the other day. I say ‘attempting’, because in my books it can’t possibly count as a skol if you take more than 10 seconds and if Bob Hawke can do three in the meantime:

 

Judging by the vigor of Bill’s attempt, I think this may have been him five minutes later:

(Just kidding: that was actually Bill finding plenty of safe land space in Kirabati in 2015 to dance the night away – incredibly without falling into the rising seas that are supposedly engulfing the island).

This is Tony Abbott doing his skol in about 7 seconds in 2015:

This was Judith Ireland of the Sydney Morning Herald trying to lay on the sanctimony regarding Abbott, while still maintaining praise for Bob Hawke – on the basis that Abbott was promoting binge drinking, that we’ve supposedly ‘moved on’ and – worst of all – that men cheering a beer skol is apparently ‘hyped-up’ and ‘macho’:

Why Tony Abbott’s skol doesn’t sit quite right

And yet there’s something about the skol that doesn’t sit quite right. It’s not just that the Prime Minister is supposed to be a vocal advocate against binge drinking. 

Or that our culture has (supposedly) moved on from Hawkie’s glory days, when being able to drink beer very quickly made you really awesome. 

Perhaps it is that it was an unmistakably and assertively macho act – amid a chanting group of hyped-up dudes. And that it came from a Prime Minister who has been trying for the last 18 months to convince us that he is also the Minister for Women. 

Firstly, I wonder how Judith was able to tell that everyone cheering Abbott on was male? I’ve looked at the video a few times now and can’t tell for the life of me. She must be really good at investigative journalism. Or not.

Secondly, I wonder what Judith and SMH will have to say about Bill?

This entry was posted in Federal Politics and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

35 Responses to Beer Politics

  1. classical_hero

    Crickets. That will be the only sound you hear.

  2. Crossie

    Secondly, I wonder what Judith and SMH will have to say about Bill?

    Why of course, he will be declared as genteel and not like that ruffian Abbott.

  3. Infidel Tiger

    Shorten probably couldn’t remember if that was the beer he had dropped the rohypnol in or not.

  4. John constantine

    Their senior labor figure has built a bulletproof career out of remembering exactly which beer has the extra shots of vodka in it.

  5. Habib

    Shorten’s a big girls blouse, but could you imagine Lord Waffleworth biting the arse out of a can of VB and popping the ring-pull?

  6. Nick

    Lol it goes to show the partisanship of the media and the hiding Abbott copped.

  7. H B Bear

    Poor Tits. Imagine living life as a fraud – selling out the wukkas just minutes after you had been rousing them up from the back of a flat top ute and then heading off to Raheen for dinner with Dick Pratt to discuss selling out the wukkas again.

    If Peanut Head is going to be passed off as a man of the people the Liars spin merchants are going to have to do better than this. Tits and Waffleworth are literally the only thing keeping the other in a job.

  8. John constantine

    Their turnfailure has been known to allow the champagne to linger nearly too long upon his palate, before using the spittoon at tastings.

  9. Shy Ted

    If you go to her article, click on her name, you get “Judith Ireland is a special writer, weekends, for the Sydney Morning Herald and The Age, based at Parliament House”. But I think a word is missing – “Judith Ireland is a special needs writer, weekends, for the Sydney Morning Herald and The Age, based at Parliament House”. FIFY.

  10. Procrustes

    Why are you asking questions you already know the answers to?

  11. Zulu Kilo Two Alpha

    Poor Tits. Imagine living life as a fraud – selling out the wukkas just minutes after you had been rousing them up from the back of a flat top ute and then heading off to Raheen for dinner with Dick Pratt to discuss selling out the wukkas again.

    Bil Shorten is just the latest in a line of Labor politicians in the mould fashioned by Gough Whitlam – they may have never done a day’s actual work in their lives, but they know what’s best for the wukkas.

  12. James Gibson

    Bob Hawke started the total destruction of Australia’s egalitarian foundation though. Why anyone anything other than despises him bemuses me.

  13. James Gibson

    My comments are always held for moderation often for several days. I only comment on the one machine. It’s impossible to participate because of this; by the time my comments have been approved the discussion is over.

    Please stop this and let me just comment normally.

  14. Rob MW

    Tits with a mini-bar. Looks like identifying as a limp chameleon has fooled the wukkas.

  15. Motelier

    Tits with a mini-bar. Looks like identifying as a limp chameleon has fooled the wukkas.

    The first time I read that sentence I was sure it said mini- bra.

    Has Jacques finally got the edit function working?

  16. Up The Workers!

    Duty propagandist bigot, Judith Ireland of Fauxfacts’ “Silly Moaning Haemorrhoid”, probably thinks that Bonking Billy Short One’s allegedly getting a 16-year-old Young Labor Supporter drunk and then raping her at a function at Geelong, is an expression of his attractive manliness.

    A.L.P. – Always Lie Prolifically!

  17. Suburban Boy

    Give Ireland back to the Irish.

  18. I am the Walras, Equilibrate, and Price-Take

    Judith Ireland lol.

    People pay for this crap. F*** me.

  19. L.B.Loveday

    “..getting a 16-year-old Young Labor Supporter drunk”.
    Drunk and high. That is a jailable offence regardless of the “alleged” rape.

  20. William will get a good talking to from the Muvva In-Law. This won’t do, this just won’t do.

  21. Rabz

    Poor Tits. Imagine living life as a fraud – selling out the wukkas just minutes after you had been rousing them up with some anti Asian rhetoric from the back of a flat top ute and then heading off to Raheen for dinner with Dick Pratt to discuss selling out the wukkas again.

    Fixed.

  22. Dr FredLenin

    I have a mate whose nephew sed to have business dealings with hawke when he was at trades haii in Carlton ,he tld his uncle he hD to get hawke before the curtin pub opened to get sense out of him ,after 11am he got worse and worse ,and you coukdntget sense out of the pisspot.
    Todays alp has no wukkas in the top jobs ,they are ll uni degree careerists who have never wrked in their lives r held a real job .so they pretend to be wukkas and one of the boys ,wishing they were in a five star restuarant with the other rich idle poofters ,frauds as well as hypocrites . There is nothing funnier or more demeaning to them than to watch one doing his wukkas act .

  23. Rabz

    That footage of Tits Peanut Head staggering around in Kiribati is absolutely bloody hilarious.

  24. Sean

    Pathetic attempt at a skol. Unfit to be PM

  25. Des Deskperson

    “Judith Ireland is a special writer, weekends, for the Sydney Morning Herald and The Age, based at Parliament House”.

    According to various websites, she’s also:

    “a freelance journalist and a researcher in the Journalism and Media Research Centre at the University of NSW.”

    ” a national political reporter, The Pulse blogger and a columnist for The Canberra Times.”

    So she either gets around a lot, she’s confused or she’s a bullish*tter. Possibly all three.

    She started at the Canberra Times, which is probably all you need to know about her. Her work there was a combination of adolescent vapidity and sub-cerebral progressive orthodoxy. She’s a ninny.

  26. Dr FredLenin

    Raheen brings back memories of the previous occupant , mannix if my memory serves me right ,if thats the case he was following in the footsteps of the gangster wren ,and bob santamaria . Imagine a union lefty dining in the place the industrial groupers and DLP were created, wouldnt worry comrade billy,as long as the tucker was free ,the wine expensive and there were women to perve on ,typical nonenklaturnik ,nyet kulturny .

  27. Myrddin Seren

    Newspoll – Preferred PM

    Shorten is still lagging Trumble in the preferred PM stakes.

    He is an unlikable grub and only there because he has convinced enough union heavies that he will do their unquestioning bidding.

    Doubtless the focus groups are telling Labor the same thing.

    Hence the Big Push by Labor and the Media Party to make Shorten the People’s PM in Waiting.

    He is still an unprincipled grub.

  28. nfw

    Doesn’t Bill have to have lime cordial in his beer? I seem to remember something about him at Young Lie-bor camps and the comment was he had to have the cordial. Wimp.

  29. Mother Lode

    Good to see mediocrity so woven into the fabric of Shorten’s being that even the boyish larrikanism that supposed by Labor to be an irrepressible strain of their pedigree hangs from him like an too-heavy, oversized suit.

    Doubtless the junkie’s wife finds indulgence in alcohol a comical throwback to a long passed age, like Bex powders, chiko rolls and suburbs.

  30. struth

    And yet there’s something about the skol that doesn’t sit quite right. It’s not just that the Prime Minister is supposed to be a vocal advocate against binge drinking.

    Looked it up.

    Not in the rule book anywhere.
    The position doesn’t constitutionally exist, so claiming what he must be vocally against binge drinking is a bit like me claiming that a Prime Minister’s job is to chuck brown eyes at biased silly moos, and tell them to STFU……………………………………………….

  31. Dr FredLenin

    The spin doctorstrying to make shorten look like wukka dont have a clue of what a wukka is they actually think that pisspot hawke was a wukka ,nothijng could be further from the truth wukks donf go to oxford .
    Politics is full of uni wankers and tenth rate lawes sackefrom S and G or morrie bkackballs . Probbly be an influx of incopetents whn Sand G is sold up by he bailiffs .

  32. Tator

    Shy Ted, please refrain from using “Special Needs” when referring to these oxygen thieves. My son is a 14 year old special needs lad with Autism, ADHD and a bucket load of other issues with acronyms and even he can write better articles than she can. Comparing her to a special needs kid is insulting to those with special needs.
    On the other hand, maybe I should run and throw my hat in for PM. After all, I have a Masters Degree in Tavernology from Flinders University Hall. I was a member of the semi finalist Flinders University Basketball club Inter-varsity team rowing team. Plus in the Uni Hall Boat races, I was drafted in by the medical students to be on their team which won the night. So I had good form for skolling beers. The only problem is that if the wukkas were terrified of Tony Abbott. Wonder what they would make of me being a big scary alpha male ex copper, now where’s my beer, that’s it, its empty…….

  33. Pickles

    Just another example of how important national institutions, pastimes and rituals have been debased, defiled and just plain rooted.

    One does not Skol beer, one Sculls beer. This comes from the sacred Rugby institution of the Beer On A Table (BOAT) race.

    At the completion of a day’s Rugby, both teams and followers adjourn to the home team’s club or pub. There, the chops of a large number of sheep are sacrificed to the flames of the barby. The sizzling chops are drowned in tomato sauce and scoffed using only the fingers (lunch hooks). Using bread to prevent burny fingers is considered gay as. Coleslaw is sometimes provided for the sheilas so long as they make it.

    Halfway through the feed, the opposing club captains are called up to make the speeches and award the points. Points are awarded 3,2,1 for the best and fairest in each grade. The winners of the points from each grade then comprise the BOAT Race team for each club, with the home team club captain being the referee and his decision is final.
    The teams line up on each side of the table. If three grades, there are nine in each team etc. The home club captain stands at the end of the table, begins the race by announcing that rugby was the winner on the day sculling his schooner and placing the empty upturned schooner glass on his head and the teams follow in strict order. You cannot begin until the teammate before you places the upturned schooner on his head. The team that finishes first wins. Rules and penalties for spillage are applied arbitrarily. A team member can be disqualified for FTC (Feeding The Cat). If there is a FTC disqualification the team can still win, but the last drinker must scull two schooners to make up.

    I am aware of the use of the spelling Skull and I understand that it derives from pouring the schooner in the front of the Skull and upturning the empty on the top of the Skull, but this spelling is rare.
    The Deputy PM is a piss cutting legend can scull a schooner between 3-4 secs therefore putting to shame any Labor pretender.

  34. Tator

    Pickles,
    I believe the term Skol is a scandinavian toast which has gotten mixed up with skulling and sculling. As the rules of the Boat races I participated in were never codified in written form, it is no wonder it has gotten confusing over the 3 decades since I participated. In that case, please have one for me and ensure that it takes no longer than 4 seconds.

Comments are closed.