Catallaxy Exclusive – Labor Promises to Expand ACMA and ACCC Armory

Opposition Leader Bill Shorten has announced that a future Labor Government will legislate to empower and resource both the Australian Media and Communications Authority (ACMA) and the Australian Consumer and Competition Commission (ACCC) to embed teams of regulatory agents into organisations where there may be a regulatory risks. Teams of up to 20 regulatory officers will sit with business staff, drop into meetings and trail the CEO, executives and directors to identify misconduct before it arises.

Mr Shorten has indicated that within 100 days of being elected, a Labor Government will seek to embed ACMA teams within the offices of NewsCorp Australia and SkyNews and ACCC teams within the offices of Caltex Australia.

Mr Shorten said:

Credit where credit is due. The Liberal-National Government’s decision to finally enable ASIC to embed teams within the offices of Australian banks will send the necessary message to business about how they should behaves. And using this model, a future Labor Government will ensure that petrol companies and non-ABC media companies similarly behave.

In response to this proposal, Minister for Revenue and Financial Services, Kelly O’Dwyer, has indicated that the Government is currently investigating whether a team from the ACCC should be embedded within the offices of Coles to ensure an appropriate and consistent plastic shopping bag policy is implemented.

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34 Responses to Catallaxy Exclusive – Labor Promises to Expand ACMA and ACCC Armory

  1. Tel

    First they came for the banks.

  2. Perfidious Albino

    The Left is relentless…

  3. And so when will Labor promise to send in the watchdogs to monitor unions and industry super funds?
    Or is it yet another case of nothing to see there….?

  4. Carpe Jugulum

    And so when will Labor promise to send in the watchdogs to monitor unions and industry super funds?
    Or is it yet another case of nothing to see there….?

    Never happen, the bruvvers are beyond reproach and their business acumen is the acme.

  5. Gilas

    Guys, Spartie forgot the \sarc.

  6. H B Bear

    How about dropping a couple of CFMMEU guys into Boral, Lend Lease and all major construction companies?

    Gotta ask yourself how much worse could a Peanut Head government be than the Waffleworthian Lieborals?

  7. Squirrel

    As dark fantasies go, this isn’t bad – but, a good old-fashioned capital strike and/or some serious capital flight might be just what Straya’s vast army of Magic Pudding eaters need to re-acquaint them with reality.

  8. ACCC should be embedded within the offices of Coles to ensure an appropriate and consistent plastic shopping bag policy is implemented.

    Mr Coles, that’s what you deserve for withdrawing single bags!

    If only you hadn’t virtue signaled in the first place.
    Others. Take note.

  9. I already said in an earlier post that Labor would infuse every possible organisation with their apparatchiks.

    George Orwell was on the money, but just a few decades too early.

  10. .

    I’ve been had but this is entirely believable.

    In the early 2000s, the ACCC did some thorough harassment (“investigation”) of fuel companies in Australia.

    No fines or charges were ever laid, IIRC.

  11. Mak Siccar

    H B Bear
    #2785907, posted on August 10, 2018 at 5:29 pm
    How about dropping a couple of CFMMEU guys into Boral, Lend Lease and all major construction companies?

    For heaven’s sake, don’t give the scum any ideas!

  12. H B Bear

    As dark fantasies go, this isn’t bad – but, a good old-fashioned capital strike and/or some serious capital flight might be just what Straya’s vast army of Magic Pudding eaters need to re-acquaint them with reality.

    Squirrel at some point international capital markets will turn off the tap on this Ponzi-inflated theater of the absurd. Australian economic crises are always external.

  13. jock

    How about aec people in every members office to ensure compliance. How about hrc people in every ministers office and bedroom to ensure the no bonk policy.

  14. Ƶĩppʯ (ȊꞪꞨV)

    the left’s wet dream of sector by sector nationalisation.

  15. JohnA

    Teams of up to 20 regulatory officers will sit with business staff, drop into meetings and trail the CEO, executives and directors to identify misconduct before it arises.

    Yeah, right.

    How can “misconduct” be identified before it happens?

    Sounds like Willium (Mate) from the Goon Shows: “Ye can’t park ‘ere, mate!” “Pick up that cigarette paper, mate!”

  16. jock

    An abcc rep in every union office. With two sas commandos for protection.

  17. Roger

    Opposition Leader Bill Shorten has announced that a future Labor Government…

    Cn.: the future Labor government.

    And let us hope and pray that Kelly O’Dwyer, among others, will find opposition too much to bear.

  18. Robbo

    Making sure Coles behave properly with their plastic bag policy? Yeah I can see that as an important action for a Federal Government. Economic policy, and border security are just second rate issues behind plastic shopping bags. I’ve always thought Kelly O’Dwyer was a total waste of space, now I’m certain she should be in some other employment.

  19. Crossie

    Gotta ask yourself how much worse could a Peanut Head government be than the Waffleworthian Lieborals?

    Only three years ago we would have had a good laugh over this but nobody is laughing now. What’s more, we can thank Peter Costello for that gormless lump Kelly O’Dwyer.

  20. Crossie

    The banks and the big corps bought this on themselves. All they had to do was not be corrupt and they could not even manage that.

    Normally I would say poetic justice but when these big companies go belly up they will take a huge chunk of most people’s super with them.

  21. RobK

    I dont see how this technique is better than audits and enquiries. Im sure they had tip-offs they could have pursued with existing powers. Maybe I’m wrong but I’m pretty sure boards and management will find ways to circumvent any impost.

  22. Texas Jack

    I’ve heard Judith and Sinclair are considering holding a Catallaxyfiles investigation into whether I am Spartacus is completely full of shit, or just 90% full of shit.

  23. John Brumble

    Oh ggf, Clint. Nothing the banks have been accused of doing could not have been avoided by adults taking responsibility for their own choices.

  24. classical_hero

    Minority Report for the banks.

  25. more utter communist crap.
    Say “No”, say it now, and whenever the unelected ask, say ” No” not now, now, not ever.
    Siniare delendum est.

  26. Bugger….you got me too…my prostate misled me.

  27. Bugger me charlie….you got me too…my prostate misled me.

  28. Pingback: Catallaxy Exclusive – Spartacus Satire – Sparta-Blog

  29. Spring is coming

    Cool. Can I get Govmint person embedded into my local cafe to enforce my ‘proper construct of a flat white policy ‘?

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