Kings of Conformity

Hey, what’s the deal with Australia ending up with the world’s most cowardly comedians?

There were few nationally known ‘comedians’ in Australia prior to Paul Hogan. In the pre-war era there were funnymen in film like George Wallace and C. J. Dennis’ Sentimental Bloke; in radio like the Rudds (Dad and Dave); in the old touring theatrical companies like J. C. Williamson Ltd whose troupe featured such comedic/dramatic luminaries as Cecil Kellaway. Before that, ‘comedians’ were verse masters like Patterson and Lawson. By the 1970s, Barry Humphries had made a name for himself, Norman Gunston was emerging bandaged and neurotic from suburban obscurity, various progenitors of stand-up were playing the clubs and the midday chat shows; Graham Kennedy was already a bankable Vaudevillian wunderkind. Hogan, though, was like a synthesis of all that had gone before – famously coming down from the heights like an ocker Moses – and nobody else was quite like him. By then, few of his predecessors were household names.


… there should be a lot of mirth being generated at the the expense of the powerful, right?


Today, it’s very different. Australian comedians are everywhere. They appear on one another’s panel and game shows, host drive-time radio, appear at comedy ‘festivals,’ talk about their ‘tours’ and ‘gigs’ like so many jaded rockers and – if they’re lucky – become supposedly beloved advertising mainstays like Shane Jacobson. As the new officially sanctioned ‘Aussie,’ the ubiquitous Jacobson takes money to convince Australians that IGA embodies the spiritual essence of the old corner store. That notion is so laughable that his ads for the conglomerate might be the funniest thing he’s done since Kenny. Comedy has become so industrialised in scale and lack-of-soul that I’m genuinely surprised one of the Dawkins universities doesn’t offer a Bachelor of Laughs – with Hannah Gadsby and Wendy Harmer as adjunct professors and Rod Quantock Dean of the School. All of this means there should be a lot of mirth being generated at the expense of the powerful, right?

Wrong. Australian comedians leave the truly powerful alone. For deference, they make the bowing and scraping servant class of Victorian England look like impertinent rebels in comparison. At least those maids and butlers kept their dignity. Greta Thunberg, transgenderism, the gay lobby, Extinction Rebellion, Islam, US Democrats, feminism … nope, nothing to work with there. When they do bits on emperors unclothed, they target Liberals, Republicans, Christians (especially Catholics) and men (preferably white). On The Today Show last week, Lawrence Mooney said of Margaret Court that “she should be charged for her opinions.” He wasn’t joking. He wants the nation’s greatest ever tennis player arrested. Because it helps his career to say so.


In the end, they hate their audience …


These people fear only one thing: losing their meal tickets in the incestuous East German world their own pusillanimity and witless snobbery created in the first place. They crave money, bookings, a lifetime commercial relationship with the ABC or making it in movies. (They’re all actors, don’t you know). Deep down, they accept that their craft has been captured by sour, ugly leftism and some of them possibly even bristle at the realisation. But once they hit even early middle age, it’s hard to choose funny if it means dis-invitations and censure from the corporate ‘values’ police and the outrage barkers. In the end, they hate their audience because they hate what they themselves have become. Mooney is no dill. He’s no Einstein either – not even the “funny” one from Tasmania. But he knows that attacking a 77 year-old Christian woman is the smart play. It will keep him in ‘gigs’ if not giggles for years to come. Anyway folks, you’ve been a great audience.

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43 Responses to Kings of Conformity

  1. stackja

    Most ‘comedians’ today are a joke.

  2. candy

    On The Today Show last week, Lawrence Mooney said of Margaret Court that “she should be charged for her opinions.”

    Not sure if this is about getting more gigs/money but a person who likes to be a leader of a group and bully a more vulnerable target ( a 77 year old private citizen).

    Possibly he was a bully in school? I don’t know if this just happens.

  3. Mark M

    Like the abc show Planet America, who failed to predict President Tump, they are the joke and they can’t see it.

    Keep up the good work, Chaz & John.

  4. mh

    Keep up the good work, Chaz & John.

    You have to be kidding.

    Shut It Down

    Fire Them All

  5. Dr Fred Lenin

    The greatest Oxymoron in Australia “a well known abc comedian “ .
    A lot wrong with that statement ,thhe abc is well known ? The person is a “comedian “? .
    The facts , most people dont watch or listen to the abc ,so how can they be well known ?
    Comedians are funny and make people laugh <politics is funny but it doesnt cause laughter .
    Now if it was “a well known abc gangrene left propagandist ,that would tick all the boxes .
    It is not PC to be funny the global thunberg climate crisis is bloody serious comrades .

  6. mh

    People create their own comedy now

    Donald J. Trump
    ‏@realDonaldTrump

    She seems like a very happy young girl looking forward to a bright and wonderful future. So nice to see!

  7. procrustes

    I’d just like them to be funny

  8. Bruce in WA

    Certainly not an ABC “comedian”, but no leftist either:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS2cahS_PlQ

    NSFW!! (Probably)

  9. tgs

    Jim Jeffries would be the most successful Australian comedian these days.

  10. feelthebern

    Jim Jeffries would be the most successful Australian comedian these days.

    I don’t find Jim Jeffries funny.
    I can see how Americans find him funny, due to the bunged on ocker spiel.

  11. You can always tune in to Isaac Butterfield, he can be very rude and crude and takes on the SJWs.

  12. P

    Roy Rene

    As the bawdy character Mo McCackie, Rene was one of the most well-known and successful Australian comedians of the 20th century.

    Although widely unknown overseas, ‘Mo’ was hailed by visiting celebrities such as Dame Sybil Thorndike and Jack Benny as a comic genius in the company of Charlie Chaplin. Lecherous, leering and ribald, he epitomized the Australian ‘lair’, always trying to ‘make a quid’ or to ‘knock off a Sheila’; yet some of his funniest moments were when he was being ‘posh’, as in his outrageous parody of Noël Coward’s Private Lives with Sadie.

  13. tgs

    I don’t find Jim Jeffries funny.
    I can see how Americans find him funny, due to the bunged on ocker spiel.

    His earlier stuff I really liked. The special called Alcoholocaust was his peak I reckon.

    His more recent stuff is pretty average.

  14. Tony Tea

    I often wonder whether an Aussie similar to someone like Bill Burr would cut it in Straya.

  15. Pete of Freo

    Will Anderson, a be-suited, and salaried compare of a state sponsored, unfunny, show about advertising. He’s become everything he despised. I’d almost feel sorry for him if I wasn’t forced to pay his wages.

  16. Shy Ted

    Lotsa clowns, so few comedians.

  17. iamok

    There is not one funny current Aussie comedian, though I still have a soft spot for Lano and Woodley. But I do note Shane Jacobsen is the Chief Scout so at least he contributes something positive to the community. The absolute worst is that steaming pile of dogshit Wil Anderson closely followed by that other unfunny turd Kevin Rudd.

  18. Tony Tea

    How would Bill Hicks have viewed Will Anderson? I’ll give you a clue:

    By the way if anyone here is in advertising or marketing…kill yourself.

  19. Old Lefty

    A thirty-year-old observed to me the other day that today’s ‘comedians’ tend to start in the toilet and descend from there. There are still some young people with taste.

    Compare this with, say, Noel Coward. When social mores frowned on outright crudity, it took genuine wit to be risque.

  20. Tom

    Australian comedians leave the truly powerful alone. For deference, they make the bowing and scraping servant class of Victorian England look like impertinent rebels in comparison.

    It’s as if the Australian comedy scheme of the 1980s and 1990s never existed. In Melbourne, the Last Laugh in Collingwood (now defunct) was the biggest of half a dozen live venues pumping out stand-up to audiences of hundreds, while TV shows like the Late Show (ABC) were smash hits, taking the piss out if politicians and the powerful with none of the current crushing conformity where TV comedy still exists.

    Almost overnight at the turn of the century, the Australian comedy business virtually disappeared up its own arse as it joined the cultural left and everything that used to have the piss taken out of it was suddenly off-limits.

    Because Australian “comedians” are now such conformist sheep, we will once again be led out comedy’s death valley by the Americans through online sites like Babylon Bee and Genesius Times, which have a treasure trove of stupidity to work with as comedy source material lampooning, among others, the old ruling class comedians, who are as funny as cancer.

  21. Nato

    Loved the throwback to the nineties observational. I lol’d4reelz.
    And now I have a craving for eggs…or a cigarette. Dunno.

  22. Con the Fruiterer would be hung drawn and quartered today.
    So would Wog Boy.
    (Can I say wog on this site?)

  23. hahahahaha looks like I can’t say it hahahaha

    Baa Humbug
    Your comment is awaiting moderation.
    #3207620, posted on November 10, 2019 at 6:03 pm

    Con the Fruiterer would be hung drawn and quartered today.
    So would W o g Boy.
    (Can I say w o g on this site?)

    I put spaces between the letters to avoid the censors hahahaha

    (I’m funnier than the current crop of Aussie Cowardly “comedians”)

  24. Percy Popinjay

    Max Gillies – his no holds barred portrayals of pretentious wankers such as Bobby Hughes (of the Turnbuckle clan) and Germs Greer would not be tolerated nowadays (stage show at the Oprah ‘oose in 2003).

    Not to mention his glorious send ups of Bobby Hawke and a legendary character known only as “the Goanna“.

  25. Percy Popinjay

    On this however, I think we can all agree – Ozzie “comedians” (if they can be dignified with such a term) nowadays are about as funny as a dead dingo’s donger.

  26. Ironically, Robert G Barrett ALREADY took the piss out of them, in The Case of the Talking Pie Crust.

    These insufferable dickheads would take a “dramatic” role in Gone with the Willy Wind, but the ABC has desecrated that as well.

    Their continuing anthologies of work are like covering up a bad meal with evermore gravy.

  27. Muddy

    Elliot Goblet.
    Observational comedy in a deadpan tone.

  28. Muddy

    Insomedy – a non-humorous mutation of traditional comedy where the intent is to both insult and induce sleep within, up to half of one’s audience. Parasitic by nature, insomedians often attach themselves to a public broadcaster and burrow so deeply that surgical removal becomes the only, albeit expensive, option. Conservative scientists are still seeking a natural predator or other biological solution. Hence the hopeful phrase ‘Coat me in trump and throw me to the insomedians.’ Muddy.

    Via the Catictionary.

  29. Squirrel

    Tim and Debbie used to be spot-on satire, now they’d be a documentary –

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsBJeFirre0

  30. As the bawdy character Mo McCackie, Rene was one of the most well-known and successful Australian comedians of the 20th century.

    @P – Agree that Mo deserves to be remembered. And today we have Austen Tayshus, another of the same self-critical iconoclast mob.

  31. feelthebern

    You want edgy comedy?
    Youtube the Opie & Anthony show with Jim Norton with guests like:
    Louis CK, Bill Burr, Patrice O’Neal (RIP).
    That’s the stuff that would have The Project, Q&A & the Hypocrite Pirate fainting.

  32. feelthebern

    Opie & Anthony read Anthony Wiener sexting verbatim.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZcqcgGyO2E

    Imagine an Australian comedian taking the piss out of any politician like this.

  33. feelthebern

    We need freedom of speech laws in Australia asap.

  34. Hell of a guest list for those lads:

    Patrice O’Neal, Kevin Smith Dr Michio Kaku & Chris Cornell

  35. feelthebern

    Opie & Anthony show in NY was the nexus for the American comedy scene.
    When it was on.
    They all talk about how they miss it so much.
    They being every comedian in the US.

  36. feelthebern

    On youtube, search Opie & Anthony & almost any comedian you like and you can get some long form (sometimes 4 hours) of them riffing.

  37. Percy Popinjay

    This Sporting life. Definitive and illustrated by Bill Leak.

  38. duncanm

    There are some funny comedians about, they just don’t run in the ABC circle-jerk comedian tours.

    Paul Fenech (fat pizza) for example.

    These guys and girls are funny:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rm6zIfcS7xI&t=62s

    These people fear only one thing: losing their meal tickets in the incestuous East German world their own pusillanimity and witless snobbery created in the first place.

    harsh, but true.

  39. duncanm

    but start at 0s, or you’ll miss the angry cockatoo.

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